Whew! That's a relief; I was afraid I had bared my soul to the wrong person....
I've explained this to you before, but I will repeat here: I only miss that diver because of its connection to my long-ago first tank. I know it was tacky! I kept it going because my wife hated it! To her it was a tasteless piece of plastic; to me it was a tangible link with the past and brought back all sorts of wonderful memories. My big mistake was removing it and setting it aside when re-doing a tank. I should have either put it immediately into another tank, or at least hidden it away in a drawer or box. When the heartless harpy chanced upon the poor little guy in the open, vulnerable and helpless...he was doomed!
But I have other ways to torment her. I use a large number of concrete drainage-pipe sections in various tanks as caves and hides; she hates those. I encourage snails in all my tanks; she abhors snails. I have a cool DIY ornament made of a Grolsch beer bottle, siliconed at a jaunty angle on a piece of ceramic tile and with a hole cunningly drilled in the bottom to which I run an airline. The tile is buried in the substrate...the airline is hooked up...and the Grolsch bottle bubbles merrily, 24/7 nonstop; she detests that. And, of course, I have several carefully cleaned animal skulls...a couple of antlered deer, a coyote, a shed antler...in various tanks as keynote decor pieces; she positively loathes those.
So, even without the diver...I'm good to go!