This is definitely to be expected of any male from any species of Amphilophus, it's just how they act, females don't generally make good wet-pets nor are they very owner-responsive. I agree about male Amphs being kept communicably but female Amphs always seem to be a great addition an aggressive cichlid community.
Females are often perfect for tanks w/ other males of equal size (but not limited to) and slightly milder aggression like GTs, JDs, several Parachromis, Convicts, Vieja, and various others and they are often indifferent to Plecos and other Bottom-feeders. They also do not grow as large, neither in length or weight.
That's a hell of a nice little beast you got there....still got a bit of growing to do also. 5' tank is definitely better than a 4' tank for these guys, but again, if you have a female there's a good chance she will be fine in a 75g or a 90g if neccessary